problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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