clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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