I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize