Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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