Can i not drive my cunt home
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
