just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize