we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize