Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
How external is "for external use only"?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
