I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
