All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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