were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
We're not piercing ourselves today.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
