well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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