Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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