Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
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