I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
