no, he came in my armpit
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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