So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize
