Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
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