your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
wanna go halves on a baby?
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize