I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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