I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
