Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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