is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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