Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
