It's Friday. Sex?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
he fucked my hip out of place.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize