Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
