i can't believe i had my finger in that
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
