I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
