whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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