And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
