I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I think i got beer on your cat.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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