nut hugger
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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