Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
You can't motorboat a personality
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
Randomize
