She is in my trunk
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
