Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
