how can u be prego again
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
