Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
