If i come over, it means nothing
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
