Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Randomize
