your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Farmville is her only friend.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize