If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize