Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
