Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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