It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
