Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I have tasted many bathrooms
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
