Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
is that a dick in a sweater?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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