I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
