Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
