I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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