I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
