Three words: puerto rican gang bang
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Can you repeat that, but with context?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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