Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Randomize
